The UN of holiday songs

While in Austria, I was inspired to learn a tiny bit of German - so I can proudly say that now I know Silent Night in German (Stille Nacht). Add this to Adeste Fideles and Feliz Navidad, and I am a veritable encyclopedia of international carols. (Mind you, I only know the first verses, but that counts, right?)

Learning something new every day. Literally.

Life lesson #47857: always mow the lawn BEFORE raking the leaves. I learned this the hard way over the weekend, when I reversed the order and my two hours of raking leaves became virtually imperceptible. Stupid mower blew leaves all over the yard again. But I guess it was fewer leaves? Whatever.

25,000 imported Italian twinkle lights. Per house.

I will try to back up this statement with photographic evidence this week, but let me state for the record: my neighborhood is putting up Christmas lights. And I no longer need to be concerned that my Griswold tree outside is an eye sore. In fact, people probably wouldn't even notice it at all if my lights weren't the only ones that stayed on all night. (Seriously - why are people turning them off at 10pm? Is this a new burglar-repellent tactic I'm not aware of? Just electricity-conscious neighbors? Guess it's all fun and games until I get my electric bill.

But seriously y'all. These lights are bad. I am very curious to see who wins lawn of the month for December. Because surely Christmas lights will be involved. Stay tuned.

Humbug?

Is it weird to get invited to someone's office holiday party when you aren't dating them? I mean, obviously I said yes, but still. Odd.

Still gobbling

As I mentioned, I successfully cooked several Thanksgiving dishes: a sweet potato/apple casserole, cornbread dressing, a cranberry cake and of course the turkey. But it was not without typical Sarah mishaps: apparently I bought a turkey breast, instead of a whole turkey. (All white meat!) I ask you: how in the hell was I supposed to know? It was in the frozen section, it was a turkey...

Actually, it turned out perfectly - we don't eat the dark meat anyway. Just means I have a crapload of leftover turkey. #lessonlearned #sortof

Love or basketball. Clearly not both.

Chatting with a guy online on Monday, and he seemed nice and normal. Then all of a sudden I guess he revisited my profile page and said "You're a Tar Heel? Oh nooooooo." I knew where this was going. "Duke fan?" I wrote back. "Oh noooooo." Luckily he didn't actually go there, but has family that did and is clearly not afraid to throw out a "Go Duke!" Sigh. Of all the guys enrolled in online dating websites, the Dook fan has to email me. #thestruggleisreal

Celeb news: the good, the bad and the ugly

The good:

How amazing does Amy Schumer look in the Pirelli calendar?? LOVE. #yougogirl

The bad:

Kylie Jenner's "Lip Kit" sold out in 30 seconds yesterday. People do realize that you can't get lips like hers with makeup, right? It's fillers, obviously. Which is way more than $29...

The ugly:

Mary-Kate Olsen married Olivier Sarkozy over the weekend, and the decor included cigarettes. Bowls and bowls of cigarettes. I get that he's French, but Jesus.