And now, a very special Bachelor in Paradise

I was totally reminded of the "very special" episodes of 80s sitcoms last night. And not really in a good way.

The first 45 minutes was Evan and Carly's wedding, which I mostly fast-forwarded through because who cares. Then we're back to Paradise, and Chris gathers the cast together two weeks after production is shut down. (Well - the cast minus DeMario and Corinne...) The group discusses what went down, talking about consent and race and alcohol (we learn Taylor doesn't drink) and how producers DON'T MAKE US DO ANYTHING. This part was reiterated several times (thanks, ABC lawyers!). Everyone feels bad for both parties, but they don't think any wrong-doing occurred. Would still love to see the video footage to determine this for myself, but whatevs. Back to drinking and dating and debauchery!

We learn that both Robby and Ben Z "hit up" Raven over the break, and she ghosted both of them. Atta girl. And Dean visited Kristina in Kentucky, which went well but he seems disinterested back in Paradise. Taylor and Derek are a solid couple, even getting a date card which leads Taylor to decide to sleep with him! #consent

Poor little "fun-size" Alex keeps chasing Amanda around, but she is not interested buddy. Lacey wished Canadaniel would show up (side note: he and Vinny were just on Millionaire Matchmaker, for what it's worth), and things aren't going great for Jasmine either - Matt seems to be putting on the breaks. Cue fresh meat...