Bachelor in Paradise recap: Deanie's a weenie

One more thing I can blame Trump for: interrupting Paradise. #un-American

But I will try to focus on the task at hand - the recap. The girls are hungry for fresh meat, and who should arrive but Adam (and creepy Adam Jr., of course). He dives right in and asks Raven on a date, much to the chagrin of Ben Z (who keeps bringing up his dog, bless his heart), and to a lesser extent Robbie. They have a good date - apparently they met up in Dallas during the "break" (??) - and Raven is torn between a doll and a hard place on who to give her rose to.

Robbie bounces back with Amanda, but knows it's delicate territory since he's friends with her ex-fiancé Josh. (Of course he is.) He asks for a kiss, and Amanda says no thanks. Hmmm.

Dean and Kristina have a chat, and he wants to slow things down a bit - but wants her rose because he wants to keep getting to know her! Sure he does. The bloom is off the rose for me with this guy.

After five long hours of television, we finally have the first rose ceremony. Vinnie (in an unfortunate rose shirt), little Alex, Iggy (too many bromances, too few romances) and Nick (Santa Claus) did not get roses and head home in the exit suburbans. Shout out to Vinnie struggling with his seat belt. Bless.

But the storms aren't over - next to arrive is Danielle L (aka "D-Lo"), who prances around in a low-cut number and has every guy drooling. She wavers between Ben Z and Dean, but decides to ask Dean on a date. To Kristina's horror, he accepts. Again - kind of getting a d-bag vibe from this guy. They went on their ATV date and shared a kiss - which Dean later admitted to Kristina. But what really set her off was Dean presenting a piece of cake to Danielle in front of everyone for her half-birthday. D-bag, meet D-Lo. #perfectmatch