Bachelor recap: cock-a-doodle don't do it, Becca!

Bali. Hi. (Shout-out to anyone picking up on that South Pacific reference.) We finally get to leave the United States, and for good reason - it's fantasy suite time for the three remaining ladies. In Bali. Hi.

I'm at the airport, so will have to make this recap brief. Which is good, because overall I found it fairly boring. Blah blah Chris is torn, blah blah the ladies are in love, blah blah temples, blah blah Becca the Virgin, blah blah Chris is sweating through his shirt.

Seriously - Kaitlyn and Whitney's dates were just not all that interesting to me. Something Bali-esque, followed by a romantic dinner and the women telling Chris they were falling in love with him and yes, Arlington Iowa sounds like a lovely place to live! Becca's date was a tad more interesting, simply because she hadn't told him she was a virgin and would she make it out of the hallowed doors of the fantasy suite remaining one? (It seemed like she was wavering on her beliefs here, but maybe I was just projecting.) She finally told Chris the truth, and the awkward pause and sigh he let out wasn't the best case scenario. He's probably like "seriously?! Another one?!" But he covered his tracks, telling her he was glad she told him (then quickly told the ABC intern to remove some of the kinky sex toys from the fantasy suite, stat!).

At the rose ceremony, Chris is dressed in a karate gi, which I guess is traditional Balinese wear, but looks like he's en route to the dojo. All the women are also dressed in traditional garb - thank god Kaitlyn got the pink one to match her lipstick! Chris tells Chris Harrison he is falling for all the women, and how is he supposed to choose? Man up, farm boy. He instead takes this opportunity to pull Becca aside, which Kaitlyn and Whitney take to mean she's getting the boot. Whitney likes this idea, since Becca is really young and doesn't know anything. (Let it be known that they are only 3 years apart people.) But wait - Chris returns with Becca! What kind of sick and twisted crap is this?!

Whitney and Becca get the roses, which means Kaitlyn and her rapping self are headed home. She doesn't understand what happened, and Chris' whispers don't really help explain anything. I did enjoy the random rooster crows during their serious talk, however. Really lightened the mood for me. And so farmer-ish! Well-played, Bali.

Next week: the women tell all! Should be a train wreck. In the best possible way.