What NOT to say to a single person

Thank you Amy for sending me this...

Apparently Glamour magazine asked single gals to send in their most hated cliches about being single. Drumroll, please:

"It happens when you're not looking." But we're ALWAYS looking.

"There are plenty of fish in the sea." Have you SEEN some of the fish in the sea? Those gross bottom-feeders with whiskers? (And yes, although I am actually talking about fish, this could also describe some of the men out there.)

"So, why are you single?" This is my least favorite. I mean, if I knew, I wouldn't BE single, would I?!

"You're too picky." I've been getting this one from my mom lately. And although it is probably true, why SHOULDN'T I be picky? You think long and hard about what movie to rent. Why not be selective about what man you're going to spend the next 40 years with?

"He's out there." Really? Thanks.

"It just takes one." This could also apply to a fatal heart attack. Not helpful.

"Just have fun with it!" WTF. Does dragging yourself to bars where the girls are all 10 years younger sound like fun to you?

"I wish I were single and in your shoes - the grass is always greener!" No, it's not. Grass can be brown and dead. (No, I'm not bitter. HA!)

"Don't you have any friends who can set you up?" Obviously not. That well has run dry, peeps.

And the last one, also becoming frequent with my mom: "You should freeze your eggs." Alrighty.