Plastic medals for everyone!

Olympic fever has even hit my office - next week we're hosting our very own Olympiad, complete with sad little games that include:

Balance beam (on a piece of duct tape)
100-yard dash (in a rolling chair)
Swimming relay (which doesn't involve water; merely pantomiming the strokes while wearing goggles and flippers)
Archery (shooting mini-marshmallows)
Hurdles (over boxes of paper)

Should be tough. My co-workers better be relieved that I'm judging, so can't compete. I shoot a mean mini-marshmallow.